Is my book any good?
Should I get it published?

Book Title

Lockdown Alpha

Author

Karl Shergill

Genre

Fiction

Overview

This is the story following Karan and his turbulent life during the Covid pandemic. We first meet Karan where he has travelled to India just before the pandemic, where we learn about Amrita and her unrequited feelings towards Karan. Karan is dedicated to his wife and uncomfortable with these feelings, with his main priority to return home to the UK to Jessica and his son Theo, but to no avail due to the lockdowns coming into place all over the world.

As we follow along this story, we come to understand Amrita’s feelings are stronger towards Karan than expected, giving the impression that she is becoming more obsessive, despite her being married, and she makes no move to hide her feelings, leading to her own husband’s misery in this knowledge.

This story also follows and intertwines the story of Karan’s life in the same timeline as the pandemic, giving insight into what was happening in real time all over the world and the troubles that were being faced by everyone to help save lives and keep people safe. This is a well-written page-turner that keeps the reader wanting more and intrigues the reader excellently throughout the story.

Formatting

Formatting yet to be applied:

• A cover page would be a nice addition
• Paragraphs need to be indented and spaced consistently throughout
• The different sections/chapters to be on new pages and separated clearly to show the next section of the book

Copyediting/Proofreading

A full copy edit would be needed here. Edits specifically needed around adding/changing punctuation and grammar changes to ensure best formats of sentences. Sentences would need to be split in areas to separate independent clauses and commas are missing, which create the natural breaks. A full copy edit will help this, followed by a subsequent proofread.

Consistent punctuation types would be beneficial here too, such as straight or curly quotation marks, rather than both. The edits would be most needed around the speech to ensure best grammar and accuracy around the punctuation.

• g., pg.2: “”I’m afraid I won’t be able to meet today.” Amrita informed on her mobile” – a comma to be used in place of the full stop at the end of the speech and a full stop at the end of the sentence after “mobile”. The flow of the sentence could also be improved to “Amrita spoke into her mobile.”
• g., pg.2: “”Why not? “Karan asked.” – the closing quotation mark should be placed directly after the end of the speech rather than the start of the speech tagline
• g., pg.4: “Yes, of course, please go ahead” – change the comma to a full stop after “course” and add a full stop after “ahead”
• g., pg.4: “If you do decide to go, then “Goodbye! Love you forever!”” – no capital needed in “Goodbye” and unnecessary quotation mark in the middle of the sentence before “Goodbye”

Feedback

Structure

The overall structure of this book is well set out and has been separated well to provide a strong timeline and changes in scenes. This helps the reader understand when they are learning about a history to a relationship or when the story is giving context to different areas of the characters’ lives.

The plot

The plot is original and not one I have read before with the intertwining of a personal life and the covid pandemic, giving a real time perspective on how the main character’s life is developing along with a timeline all readers will have experienced themselves. Many bases are covered along this plot but the emotions coming through specifically Amrita foreshadow the perfect amount to the reader on where Karan’s relationship with her is heading.

Characters

There are 3-4 consistent characters that we meet and follow throughout this story. This is a great number of characters because we hear and understand the full story of each without becoming confused or their lives being hard to follow due to overcomplications.  Each character had depth and personality, making them real in the reader’s mind and easy to connect with.

Pacing

This story progressed at a great pace and each change in scene was well separated by a new chapter, ensuring that the reader didn’t get lost or was trying to understand too broad a timeline. I was able to follow along well without having to backtrack to remind myself of where I was.

Style

I enjoyed the style of writing from the author; it was relatable and personable.

Areas for improvement

The author has written a great book with a wonderful amount of depth, but the story can sometimes jump to different scenes which may not have much relevance to the storyline. From the text read, we meet some side characters and had some scenes regarding politics, but these could be better tied into the plot of the book to help the read understand why they are there. For example, when Karan is speaking to Amrita’s wife about politics over the dinner table, some explanation or rewording of these areas could help the reader understand their relevance to the story or could be reduced down, as they may not have the level of understanding of politics that the characters/author does.

The opening scene has some dialogue that may not be in keeping with the plot of the book. We first meet Karan and Amrita, and their initial conversation regarding almonds and memory loss could flow better and help set the scene a little better on what the book is to be about, creating some foreshadowing and insight into the characters and what’s to come. This will provide and initial hook for the reader, making them not want to put the book down and keep them reading on.

Overall quality

The overall quality of this work is at a high level with obvious effort and knowledge going into this well-thought-out manuscript. The author has shown passion for the writing and characters whilst providing a wealth of information, including the readers on a relatable universal topic that no one is exempt from.

Dialogue

The dialogue between the characters after the opening scene flows well and shows each of the personalities in the book. The speech isn’t jumpy and the conversations are natural. The syntax of some speech could flow better to seem even more natural in a typical conversation between friends and family, but overall, this has been well delivered.

Setting and the themes

The setting and themes of this book have been excellently chosen. We read this book about a universal topic from a different perspective and yet can relate to a lot of it. The pandemic theme is a recent and ongoing theme, making this still a prevalent topic in today’s times. The setting of reading from both UK and India gives two concurrent timelines and how the two countries were responding to the pandemic and how it impacted Karan with having ties to both. A fabulously chosen background and theme to set out the plot.

Images/Illustrations

No illustrations

Recommended Book Size

5.5” x 8.5”

Word Count

44,762 words